Cookie Butter

Hey, y’all. 🙂

Hope things are good in your part of the world and that your summer is off to a great start. 🙂

It’s crazy hot and humid here.

I’ve got an appointment with my vein doctor today. It’s just taking this thing so long to heal up. 🙁

🙂

Except for the vein stuff everything else is pretty good here. Still rocking grain free / sugar free / keto (9 months now) and I have gotten to a place where I actually love it and am not jonesing for the next planned off day. In fact I don’t even have an off day planned at all right now. Not saying I won’t plan one but right now…I don’t  need or want one and that feels so good. 🙂

Reminder: I’m still posting over on Instagram.  More frequently than here anyway. 🙂

I made these real kolaches for Papa B for father’s day and it didn’t bother me one bit.

Get the bad people / things and energy out of your life, y’all. Your world will change for the better almost instantly. 🙂

Chopped steak, caesar, loaded mashed cauli. This is one of my fav keto meals.

How many times a day do y’all feel like sayin’ this? For me it’s at least forty seventy billion.

So…what’s this cookie butter you mention, Texas Girl? 🙂

Well…it’s not actually cookies but it totally hits the spot for me anyway.

First you’ll melt 2 tbsp butter, 2 tbsp sugar sub (I use swerve) and 2 tbsp cream.

Get it all bubbly and a little bit thick (about 3 minutes).

Remove it from the heat and add sweetener drops to taste.

Of course I use liquid Splenda but you do you, boo. If you think Splenda is going to make you grow a second head…well I can’t help you. Pick something else and move on with your life. 🙂

While that cools off a little bit…take 1 – 2 cups of raw nuts (cashews are best but for a lower carb option I like macadamias). Yes I know these aren’t raw but I like the roasted taste too and this is all I could find here in Podunk and I wanted some cookie butter right that second. 😉

(Also…if you don’t want to use fresh nuts you can just use a cup of cashew butter or other bland flavored nut butter and save some time.)

Ok so take your nuts and put them in your high powered blender or your food processor.

Blend til smooth.

Add one heaping tsp of Gingerbread spice and 1 heaping tsp of Apple Pie spice plus the melted butter / sugar / cream mixture. Blend again til all mixed together and smooth.

Pour into a jar and cover. This lasts about 5 days in the cabinet or longer if you icebox it. Honestly it’s never lasted more than 3 or 4 days around here. We all love it.

So what can you do with this magical butter concoction, you ask? 😉

Well first you can make you a mini spice cake mug cake.

Melt 2 tbsp butter in a mug add: 1 heaping tbsp of your cookie butter, 1 egg and 1/2 tsp vanilla.

Mix it all together and add:

3 tbsp Almond flour, 1 tbsp Coconut flour, 1 tbsp sweetener (I used swerve) and 1/2 tsp baking powder.

Mix again and cook in micro for 1 minute.

 

Remove. Slice in three little layers.

Spread some of your cookie butter between layers. (See that Cookie Butter Torani Syrup there? It’s sugar free and to make the cookie butter easier to spread I thinned it out with a little bit of the syrup…it’s not necessary but it was good.)

Stack and ice. I used a mix of Mascarpone / Butter / Swerve and vanilla.

Oh my gravy, y’all this was GOOD. I’m honestly surprised I haven’t already made it again. (It’s only been a couple days.) 🙂

My Mema’s shrimp pasta salad minus the pasta. Topped with garlic and parm flavored Whisps. Instant seasoned ‘croutons’.

I flavor Whisps and those chicharones with popcorn seasoning. It makes them taste a million times better and I hardly ever miss chips now.

🙂

Something else to do with the ‘cookie’ butter…

I take a Snickerdoodle Keto Kookie…heat it up either in the micro or in the toaster oven. Plop a spoon of ‘cookie’ butter on top. Mix it up and eat. Almost like eating chunky cookie butter. 🙂

Finally…a before / current. This was actually a week ago. I had Sister B take a non-mirror pic but we were in Walmart and when I looked at the pic at home I realize there were some questionable items in the background so we’ll go with this one. This is one of my most favorite summer shirts but I probably won’t wear it out of the house again. The top part is way too big and the straps won’t stay up at all. Don’t wanna have a wardrobe malfunction at Walmart. 😉

Ok. Y’all have a great week and I’ll see you soon. 🙂

 

Sugar Free Key Lime Pie Filling

Hey, y’all. It’s been a while. 🙂

Things are good here. I’m still doing my day to day posting on Instagram.  Check it out if you miss me. 🙂

Hope y’all are having a great long weekend and that you took a moment to remember why we have a long a weekend. 🙂

Shall we get caught up?

just a reminder…if the pics in my post show up super small refresh the page and that usually fixes it

Some of this will probably be familiar if you’re following along on insta but as usual I’ll be a little more wordy here. 🙂

I tried peace love and low carb’s lasagna ‘noodle’ recipe. Oh my gravy, y’all this is a keeper. I LOVED this. Check out that link to her recipe if you wanna try it out.  It’s super easy and is just eggs, cream cheese, mozz, parm and spices.  I used my own sauce recipe.

If you’re missing watermelon this summer try this out.  It’s watermelon lime sparkling water with some sugar free watermelon syrup.

 🙂

This cup of deliciousness is sugar free sweetened condensed milk.

You’ll need it for a couple recipes coming up so here’s how I made it. It’s the equivalent of one can.

I put:

2 cups heavy whipping cream

2 tbsp butter

1/3 cup swerve

in an 8 cup pyrex measuring cup. Micro’d for a total of 8 minutes stopping and stirring about every minute and a half.

After 8 minutes

I stirred in:

1 tsp vanilla

24 drops liquid splenda

1/4 tsp xanthan gum.

I let it come to room temp then transferred to a bowl and into the icebox til ready to use.

after eating a few tbsp of coursethis stuff is so good I just wanna drink it with a straw. 🙂

Me too, awesome granny. Me too. 🙂

Sugar free deconstructed key lime pie. 🙂

If you’ve been reading me for a while you know I dream about key lime pie. The last thing I made before going sugar free last September was the best key lime pie filling I’d had in years.

This isn’t as good as that and it does have sweetened condensed milk (which I complained about in that post) but man this did hit the spot given how I’m eating these days. 🙂

I don’t know if y’all have seen Keto Kookies or not but I ordered some chocolate chip and snickerdoodle cookies from them.

They have a recipe on their blog for using the snickerdoodle as a pie crust.

I tried that multiple times and lost seven pretty expensive cookies in the process. They burned no matter how low I set the temp. Not willing to be deterred…or waste anymore cookies…I decided to deconstruct the ‘pie’.

I layered a snickerdoodle cookie with some pie filling and topped with homemade sugar free whipped cream. It was so good.

This is just a regular sugar full recipe that I followed exactly replacing the real condensed milk with my homemade sugar free one. Here’s how I made the pie filling.

2 eggs

2 egg whites

1/2 cup key lime juice

1 can sweetened condensed milk (the recipe above)

splash of vanilla

I made half the recipe since it was probably going to be just me eating it.

Beat the eggs and whites til completely smooth. Slowly add lime juice, milk and vanilla.

NOW here you would pour this into a pie crust and bake at 325* til set.

I am not scared of raw eggs and since I was deconstructing this I took mine in its unbaked state and folded in about half a cup of whipped cream then ice boxed it til ready to eat.

Like I said…I loved it but if you’re scared of raw eggs then you’ll need to figure out a pie crust or just bake it without a crust and use a water bath.

I’ll leave y’all with my most recent before current set of pics. I’m standing in the same place for all three.

Left to right: Late 2015, Early Oct 2016, Last week late May 2017.

Y’all have a great week and I’ll see you soon. 🙂

Y’all know we have to kick off summer with my fav summer anthem. 😉

 

 

 

 

GF Keto Mexican ‘Cornbread’

Hey, y’all. 🙂

Since we last met…

My vein procedures are heeling. I’m still in a lot of pain at times but overall it’s better. They said it can take a good while for the pain to completely go away so I’m trying to just fight thru it.  I go back at the end of the month for a follow-up to see how well the healing is going.

Picked up this daikon radish and decided to make some cheese-y scallops with it.

To go with pork rind crusted pork chops.

I was very impressed with the rinds as breading. I will definitely do this again.

I wasn’t impressed with the radish and won’t do that one again.

Relationship goals. They are so cute.

Lunch out plus some baked chicken dipped in ranch. If my Aunt P sees this she’s probably dying laughing at the vegetables I’m eating now.  When my Meme was in her latter years she suffered from Alzheimer’s and someone had to stay with her. Some of the time it would be me and Aunt P.  She was constantly trying to get me to eat all kinds of smelly vegetables. I always refused. I bet she finds this amusing now. 🙂

🙂

On to the star of todays post…

1/3 cup crushed pork jalapeno pork rinds, 3 tbsp parm, 2 tbsp whey protein isolate, 1/2 tsp baking powder, dash of salt, bog handful of grated pepper jack cheese.

Add to that: 3 tbsp sour cream and 1 egg.

350* for about 14 – 20 minutes depending on oven. In my convection oven it took 14 minutes.

Had it with left over brisket and I had my homemade sugar free bbq sauce for dipping.

Y’all this we unbelievable. Even the regular eaters in the house who tasted it loved it…and they pretty much hate everything I’m eating these days. Next time I’d make 1 1/2 of the recipe for this pan as it was just a little bit thin.  But taste wise…nobody could believe ground up pork rinds turned into this.

This week is Papa B’s B-day. Happy early bday to the very best Dad in the world. I love you. 🙂

Sad but not at all surprising.  Interesting though that this is the hill these @ssholes chose to die on.  The only good thing about it is the timing. There will be PLENTY of time between now and Nov ’18 for this to hurt real people in a very real way.  Leaving them wanting to lash out in the only way they can…with their votes.  Can’t y’all already see the ads come next August-ish? The anguished Moms of sick kids on one side of the screen contrasted with the smiling / partying faces of the human garbage senators partying at the White house on the other side of the screen.  Political suicide.

Get involved, y’all. If you have any heart at all…get involved.  Be the good.  🙂

That’s all for today. Y’all have a great week and I’ll see you soon.

Reminder: you can keep up with me on Instagram here for somewhat more frequent postings. 🙂

 

GF SF Pizzookie + Ice Cream

Hey, y’all. 🙂

I’m feeling better. Last week was super rough. Initially I was supposed to only have 2 procedures but then ended up needing a 3rd one on Friday. The pain was unbearable at times but I seem to be turning a corner now.

If you’re following along on Instagram you already know this but if not…I ate super bland and comfort type food for the first few days and then Saturday tried cheese shell tacos.

Oh my gravy, y’all that was so good. Y’all know I make cheese chips all the time. I’ve been making those since the first time I tried Low Carb eating back in ’08. But I never tried turning them into taco shells.  So much wasted time. 🙂

Anyway, through everything I’ve stayed completely on plan and I’m kinda proud of that too. 🙂

🙂

So today was my half bday. 😉

Even Omaha Steaks ‘noticed’ and offered me some kinda 1/2 off birthday combo. 😉 I didn’t buy it but thanks, OS. 🙂

We’ve been doing the whole half bday thing for a couple years now. Last year I went out to my fav Mexican place but this year I didn’t feel like that at all.

I had to have a treat though and wanted it to be 100% on plan.

So…

First I made a 1/4 of this elana’s pantry chocolate chip cookie recipe.

I used butter instead of shortening. Swerve (doubled amount) in place of coconut sugar, and chunks of this chocolate bar I make weekly. 🙂 Mixed. Shaped and into icebox overnight.

😉

Then I made a half batch of 3 ingredient no churn ice cream

If you’re not familiar with that…the regular recipe is 1 can sweetened condensed milk, 2 cup heavy cream and vanilla.

Well sweetened condensed milk is not really keto friendly so I searched and found this recipe (scroll down to the bottom of the page for the recipe).

I made a half batch. Subbed Splenda for the Swerve because it crystalized like crazy.

AND I made it in the microwave instead of on the stove. I didn’t feel like messing with anything like that for hours. 🙂  In my microwave it took about 8 minutes to cook down by half. I kept checking every 2 minutes.

It reduced by half but didn’t really thicken until I added the xanthan gum but once I did (and it rested) it was perfect. Obviously not sticky sweet like regular condensed milk but the taste was great.

Sorry I don’t have pics of any of these stages but I’m just now feeling better and didn’t feel like messing with the camera while prepping all of this.

So then I used the Vitamix to whip the cream and vanilla. Then gently mixed in the condensed milk by hand.

Put it in the freezer overnight.

Then today had one of the best keto things I’ve made yet. 🙂

The cookie wasn’t quite that dark…that pan is an aqua / teal blue…something is off with the pics.

The ice cream did freeze solid and needed plenty of counter time to become scoopable but it got there. I want to do some research to see if I can add something else to it to keep if from freezing solid for next time. I’ve seen people add a tiny bit of vodka to their homemade ice cream before. Maybe that would help.

I don’t know but I’ll have to come up with something because I can’t imagine ever paying for another sugarfree ice cream. This is too easy to make and taste wise a million times better.

This week is early voting for local elections in Texas.  Maybe wherever you call home too, non-Texans.  Get out there and make a difference NOW, y’all.  Don’t sit around waiting for 2018 – 20.  Do something NOW and start at home in your own communities. 🙂

That’s all for today.

Y’all have a great week and I’ll see you soon. 🙂

 

Happy Easter

Happy Easter, y’all. 🙂

My pretty Easter orchids. Thanks, you. 🙂

So tomorrow is my first vein surgery procedure. I have two this week. Kinda a little scared but it has to be done before the human garbage take away our insurance.

I don’t know how I’ll feel for a while after it’s done so last night I made up a bunch of safe eats to keep in the freezer.

Also don’t know if I’ll have much to blog about for a couple weeks or so. So it might be longer than usual before I update.  I just won’t know til after the procedures.

I’ll still be keeping in touch on Instagram though if you’re interested.  JATGAHB

Yeah.

I took the day off for Easter. Ate that whole box of creme eggs. Not one bit sorry. 🙂

Made this cherry rum cake like I made for Christmas because it’s the fam’s new fav and was requested as our Easter treat. Thank you so much, gfjules for making flour the whole fam eats like it’s completely normal.  🙂

So we did brisket, beans, potato salad for our Easter meal.

Y’all I cooked that brisket in the pressure cooker and it was unreal.

It was a super fatty 5 pound cut.

I put 1 cup of beef broth in the bottom of pressure cooker. Added the well seasoned and rested (about 12 hours) brisket plus a chopped onion.

Pressured on high for 110 minutes.

Let depressure naturally and then let rest overnight in the cooking pot / juices.

Sliced and reheated. Everybody loved this.

My plate plus a big ol Sonic root beer. 🙂

Totally felt like this…for a few hours. Then all the sugar / carb pains kicked in and I’m 100% ready to get right back on plan. Today the day off was worth it. We’ll see how it feels tomorrow though. 😉

That’s all for today. Hope y’all are having a great Easter weekend and I’ll see you soon-ish. 🙂

https://youtu.be/ooFnUCUI8Vg